Sabbatical Reflections 2
What happens on a sabbatical? Almost anything. And, as well, it is normal and expected for one to think about or plan for the future. It has been that way for me. In particular, one of the questions I have asked myself is, “In the next phase of life, if fear was not a factor, what would you do and how would you do it?” Another is “What decisions would you make now, and have no regrets about on your deathbed?”
I have heard, and also often repeated, that what you spend time on reveals what is most important to you. Yikes! Any softening qualifiers here? It is a penetrating statement and prompts squirms of discomfort. But it is also a true statement, even if I prefer the converse as an aspiration – to spend time on the things most aligned with your sense of purpose.
We all, more or less, plan and think about how we spend our time all the time (forgive the pun) but I can admit freely that my actual efforts did not always match the plan. And, more sobering, even if I did execute as planned, I would decide, today, to spend time on priorities that are much more different.
26 years ago, when I was an analyst at Lehman Brothers, I missed the wedding of one of my best friends. We are still as close as ever, but today I can’t understand that decision and cannot remember or ascribe any importance to the “Wall Street deal” that consumed my time that weekend I spent in Manhattan when I should have been in Dickinson, North Dakota.
The last few months, it has been indescribable engaging with my kids while at home. The little ones are smart, intriguing, honest, funny, growing fast and truly my two best friends - with whom I can’t wait to explore the future. It numbs only a little of the guilt of accepting that over the last decade they have been the biggest “investors” in my career, in the amount of time, theirs by right, that I spent elsewhere.
The truth is that, for all the time when the stars were aligned and many positive outcomes came to be (undoubtedly), there were too many times of doing things of no lasting value, of time taken away from loved ones and times when omission sub-optimized powerful moments that could have been.
Time brings growth – an inexorable but certain process in which we firm our convictions, clarify our aspirations, and build the spine of courage to unlock free will. There is a time for every purpose, the good book says, and the job is ours alone not to withhold the time that each purpose demands, and to know when to grow out of one purpose and into another.
Time clarifies our purpose.
Lately, I have been asked often about my life mission and I can easily look to where I spend my time for the answer.
What I do the most and will certainly have zero regrets about is rolling up my sleeves with those who want to do more with their gifts, who seek to reach their full potential.
I am grateful for the time and the opportunity I am having to reflect and recharge. I am also clear that time is precious and we must do what we must to make the most of each of ours. If I were to share my thoughts with my two best friends, I would implore them to courageously seek as many experiences and situations as possible that could help them discover their true north star, and start sooner rather than later in small and incremental (even if imperfect) ways to devote their time to it.
If fear were not a factor, what would you do and how would you do it? What decisions would you make now, and have no regrets about on your deathbed? Whatever your answer or your purpose ends up being, it urgently needs the gift of your time.
#purpose #courage #leadership #impact